Wednesday, August 31, 2016

See Sea Food

I went to a seafood festival last week and I pulled a mussel.

To catch fish, you need a bass kit.

Will my fish be famous and  get  endorsalment deals?   

to create these stained glass fish, I colored them in online coloring book and then edited in Super Photo app. Just Because I could.

Let me entertain you Part Two

Blazing Florida Sun Flat Tire
I was so upset when we got a flat;
I went on a tire aid.
For The Auto Body experience,
we took the car to A tire salesman, aka a cardealogist.
We had to be careful,
because if you give an engine, they take a mile.

In Previous Post I told we had a flat tire and I had to use the SMART phone for the first time. YES! I am the only old lady in the USA that doesn't use a phone and only has one for emergency use.

I had never made a call on it, when I opened it I found 179 email addresses in my contacts, not the 20 phone numbers I had programed in it. (ANOTHER POST coming soon on that)

. It took 3 tries to make the call because I hit the wrong one first, then found I had programed the wrong number under AARP Roadside Assistance.

it. took long moments to find the speaker thingy because I could not hear the Road Guy

He said 40 minutes,  give me your number and the repair guy will call you with a better estimate
OMG! what is the number? WHAT is the number..LONG moments trying to remember it. Gave it to him and
we waited and I poked for five minutes to find if I gave him the right one. I did find it hidden in the phone and it was right because then
it rang and I tapped the phone thingy and it did not answer.
(who knew you have to SWIPE not Tap to answer?)

Am I smarter than a smart phone? Absolutely NOT...

I used to have a photographic memory but I never developed it.

Anybody who makes fun of my tire tale has been driven to diss traction.

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Let Me Entertain Me...

Saturday at noonish, we stepped out of Golden Corral in 95 degree feels like 105 bright sun, walked to the car and the front right tire was down on the rim... Bob dug out the jack and it would not work. I called AARP Roadside Assistance and he said about 40 minutes.

We went back in the AC and waited, I entertained myself taking the photo of the big brother holding the baby brother in the window.. with the new phone. the one smarter than I am.

The nice young man appeared in 20 minutes not 40 and I am sure he appreciated Bob's Assistance changing the tire.
I left them in the sun and stepped in the shade and entertained myself with my phone in order to entertain YOU..
with a few phun puns

You auto know
This was the wheel deal
This was an out of auto experience.

It was a moment of wreck ignition.

But Wait... there is MORE in Let me entertain you Part Two, think Smart Phone Smarter than ME

Monday, August 29, 2016

YES! I Snailed It..

I found this snail in the back yard... can you guess what is coming?

How do snails fight?   They slug it out!!!

Do you hate snail puns? are they just to slow?
   I snailed it, didn't I? Isn't he specshell?

if you want a few laughs, pop over to Bored Panda Snail Puns

Sunday, August 28, 2016

I Had A Dream...

I had a dream...yesterday...

Bob and I were in bed, drinking our coffee as we do each morning.

I had the new laptop on the bed with us.(surprise)

The laptops new trick was each time a curse word/bad word was said the phone would ring and a loud recorded voice would say.. "that word is not acceptable"...

When we discovered this trick, we were trying different words to make the phone ring,

Damn.... Ring Ring... and I would close the laptop and it would not ring, open it and it would ring and say Word is not Acceptable....

Picture two Ancient People, in bed with coffee, opening and closing a laptop and saying Curse Words and giggling... like I said... I had a dream....

I have created an App called "Cursing Cure "  If Your Words Are Not now.. You have a choice of male/female recorded voice.  

Saturday, August 27, 2016

My Laptop Died..

My six year old HP laptop has a deceased Motherboard. The Repair Guy Said Toss it.. I did. After setting up the new Asus Notebook, I sat thinking.... ...............................

if you know me, you also know that could be dangerous to YOUR health...

Suddenly I realized I had played with every thing but THE WebCam....
I turned it on. 
Are you shocked to the core??? 
 I snapped my smiling and Oh so chubby old face

AND I reached out and grabbed....



And then....and then.... I said to Bob.... this laptop MAKES VIDEOS... Wooooo HOOOO
I am hoping you can open the one I made. If not.. Boo Hooooo

I don't  hate Windows 10 as much as I did..... I do understand it better after FIVE hours of MESSING with it...
I've Said to much, Bye Now

Friday, August 26, 2016

I petted a Bearded Dragon

Bearded Dragon

I took these photos several years ago when the petting zoo came to the nursing facility where I volunteered. I was one of many who petted him..

Senior Puns found on Pungents...

If you lose something in a nursing home, don't stop looking until you search every nook and granny.

Pastry chef's know that old age crepes up on you

Senior citizen expects discount at a supermarket: “Do you have any Grey Coupon?”

I went to a geriatrics conference in the Everglades. I was attacked by goiters.

Thursday, August 25, 2016

Random Odd Stuff

Playtime in Samsung Tablet.. AGAIN... aren't you surprised??? shocked????

Lonesome Mexican Petunia while walking laps
Sing with me now,
I'm the lonely little petunia in the onion patch, the onion jungle patch, the onion jungle patch.. I'm the ONLY little petunia in the fern patch. Oh want someone come and play with me...

Jake will, he is coming home from his walk with Daddy and it pays to have camera in hand

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Murder Most Fowl

Maybe it was a murder.. by a murder

I hope that pun didn't fly over your head

Well, I mean you don't see this aviary day
I would suppose it is murder most fowl

Well, isn't this hawkward

Don't be such a loon, I am clearly more talonted than you

You don't seem to know feather or not you want this to end

This would be murder most fowl.

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Daisy, oh Daisy

A gardener's work is a bed of roses...

Vines are short tempered, they snap at the slightest breeze.

The garden club visited the nursery and found themselves in a hosta environment

Monday, August 22, 2016

The Case of the Missing Fingerprints

My friend Madeline and her husband attended open house at the day care that their grandson would attend. For security they would need to be fingerprinted because access through the front door required a finger print to open the door....

Guess what???? they have no finger prints... none, nada, nary a one... Did you know that as we age our finger prints disappear?  NOW you know, when we age our fingerprints disappear. I checked, mine are gone too.

This could be an advantage if we wanted to live Off The Grid... or do murder/mayhem and not leave fingerprints. Oh Wait! does our DNA disappear????   I am contacting Baldacci and Grisham to give them a story line.
fingerprint ART found by Google Search
Google Fingerprint Art OH MY who Knew? Click on link for a fun time

 Fingerprints Make Good Impressions
You are my Finger Prince, The Only One in The Whorl

Fingerprints Add a Personal Touch
Guess what this smiley face means??? it means I got Photoshop CS5 in my desktop and created this face all by myself. Just So You Know..

Sunday, August 21, 2016

Bottles in the sun fun


I tried to catch some fog.. I mist!

Q: What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?
A: CoFe2
Q: What is the chemical formula for "banana"?
A: BaNa2
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium

Saturday, August 20, 2016

The Hunt for The Orginal

internet photos

Did you hear about the cowboy who thought ChapStick was to glue his pants on?

Chapsticks EOS from internet
I looked high and low for the original chap-stick, as in the lower right above.   I use it  for small cuts and for sore cuticles... paper or cardboard cuts, one dab and instant relief and it heals quickly.
(this TIP is for all of you my blog friends, because you da balm)

 Walmart's Choices were
Chapsticks Cool
Chapstick Cute
Chapsticks Flavord
Chapsticks Weird CLICK HERE for the weird
Chapsticks Best
All I wanted was The Orginial Chap-stick, and when I finally found the ugly old black and white container it cost 48 cents more than the others. 

I have a question. I am an Original from 1944... at my age, my hair is falling like snow, the hair under my arms is non existent, it just disapeared completely.. SO... Why does the hair on my legs keep growing and if I don't shave, Bob thinks he is sleeping with a Christmas tree...
NOTE: I stole the Christmas tree part off Last Man Standing on TV...  I really do want to know why the leg hair doesn't fall out to

Friday, August 19, 2016

Stormtrooper @ Publix Pharmacy

Standing at the counter in Publix Pharmacy, feeling someone staring at me, I cut my eyes to my left, and there he was... Storm-trooper, have gun will travel...

I could not decide if he was...
 A. Guarding the cut flowers 
B. Telling me I looked like I needed a cane. 
C. Protecting the pharmacist from Pharmacy Pick Up Rage.

I did my Google Search for Storm-trooper jokes and by Golly I got some Storm-trooper Jollies.
CLICK HERE if you want to laugh.. the puns they were a killing me..

Since this is the original photo from my phone, I am thinking the simple answer is...he was there for Photo Fodder. Or maybe Super Photo Play time fodder... Who knows? I have no clue..

Thursday, August 18, 2016

Good Fence Thursday

My wife asked me if I thought we needed new garden furniture. I’m sitting on the fence.

A friend of mine is like lightening when hammering nails into his fence. He never strikes the same place twice.

Joining TexWisGirl in Good Fence Thursday
Shadow Shots of our side yard fence..yes that is the invasive Virginia Creeper
sign found on internet, not mine

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Along Came a Spider part 2..

Not one spider in the bathroom since my prior post on July 22 of Along Came a Spider.
 The answer was natural repellents for spiders..found by Google Search
5 drops of Peppermint Oil
4 drops of Dawn Dish Detergent
Warm water in a spray bottle
Shake and Spray all crevices and places they might visit.
IT WORKS.. and it smells good.
 Tea Tree, Citrus, Lavender Oils all work. I chose peppermint because of scent allergies.
Received from Amazon in 2 days. $7.00 was the price. 

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

More Phun Puns

Water you thinking about?
This place is a real dive....

What a load of carp!
Stop being so shellfish
Are you eeling over with these puns...

Monday, August 15, 2016


I did not do this post on porpoise...
I am just fishing for compliments
and angling for praise.

Water skiing can be a drag........

This shore is a long  post...

Sea, they never stop coming....

Sunday, August 14, 2016

Sunday Sunrise

Our lives are like a sailboat.. some row and go, some blink and sink...

Life is like the sea. When the waters are rough, the only way to keep your boat moving is to keep rowing.
 Author Unknown

Saturday, August 13, 2016

Again? She's at it Again?

On the same morning we discussed Capacitors in bed (see yesterday post), 
 Bob said.......

"So round, so firm, so tightly packed. So free and easy on the draw."

I said "WHAT???" 

Do any of you know what this is? I did not
Scroll down
It was an advertisement for Lucky Strike cigarettes from the early 40's... He has no idea why he remembers it or why it suddenly popped from his mouth.

We think he remembers it because this song was on the hit list for 21 days when he was growing up. it is made with slogans from all the ads during 1947.
Personally I think the ad below is why he remembers it, NOT the song you will hear below the ad
.. IF your ears can stand it..