The past 4 days have been like hanging by a thread over a tornado below me.
No Bob's fall 5 days ago did not do permanent injury
His back still hurts, he has been flat of his back in bed for days, and had to be forced to move, by caregiver and PT, OT, RN etc. the worst part is his dementia escalated and this means I de-escalated, mine went with his.
I know what you are thinking. Then how did you do this post. Its because Sunday we have no visitors, and I have been awake since 1 am listening to him talk out of his head, sitting on sofa where he can SEE me, because he panics if I am out of sight.
Things are NOT Good, I am Not Good, he is Not Good. Beau is not Good.
Each day Beau and I have our Alone Time on our daily walk.
God's blessings were with us as we walked in Cool Temps, 74 blessed degrees with a heavy breeze from our beaches.
A stunning view of a hawk that was at least 20 inches tall, sitting on the wire watching for his breakfast
 | |
| photo from | https://pictureinsect.com/wiki/Romalea_microptera.html |
I could not get a photo, with Beau on leash and cars both directions, we could only view the sight of the giant orange sun, sitting directly in the middle of our street on the horizon, as it spilled golden flood of light down the entire street in front of us. I took Beau inside and came back up but nothing left for my phone to take.
I took and old photo of our yard and added the sea of gold that we saw.
Thank you Lord for the safe and beautiful walk and for my brain to work long enough to do this post. We are not back yet, soon I hope. We visit the Orthapedic Doctor tomorrow for the final check up of his fractured ankle and hope and pray there is no fracture from the fall that we don't know about.
 |
| Flood of gold by MadSnapper using old photo in procreate |
34 comments:
Very difficult times indeed, Sandra. I don’t think I can imagine the daily issues you have to cope with. My thoughts are with you but that is little consolation or comfort.
Thanks for the update. It's good to know that you still have an eye for moments of beauty, in the midst of your daily chaos... ♥♥ Hope all goes as well as possible with the appointment tomorrow!
Thanks for the update Sandra! I am glad you are able to get out for a walk with Beau, the descriptions of what you saw sound beautiful. The sunrise and hawk sightings are simple pleasures that can bring you some joy. I hope all goes well with the appointment tomorrow. Sending prayers and hugs for you all!
Oh my word, his arm looks horrible. That really looks like it would hurt.
I imagine those morning walks with Beau are a little bit of heaven, especially when it gives you beautiful sights to see.
Hope all goes well with the Orthopedic doctor tomorrow.
We are sending you a big hug all the way from France.
His poor arm! Ouch! May that heal soon.
It's so sad to watch our loved ones go downhill. It breaks my heart too. I'm learning a lot by what you're having to endure. You're so strong. I love your attitude but I feel your pain too and send prayers. It's a mixed bag, isn't it?! Does it help to watch Christian video's (sermons by Charles Stanley, etc.) and play happy Christian music? I know when I'm stressed and can't read or concentrate I do that. Kinda takes my mind of my own trials.
We're heading to Sunday School and Church. They are my touch stone in this crazy, mean, evil, wicked, nasty world.
Love ya lots cousin. Will lift you up with extra prayer at Church today. May Jesus rescue us all soon.
I'm sorry Sandra. I'm not sure how you handle it, but I'm glad you take hold of these joyful moments. Hugs and prayers.
{{{HUGS}}}
Hari Om
Those special moments sent as signals that you are NOT alone, no matter how often it may feel that way. You have the strength of Love and Faith and it will carry you through it all. Big hugs. YAM xx
Great big hugs from all of us. Please know we're always thinking of you and the challenges you face each and every day.
I'm so sorry that things are not good for you three. I do understand the joy of going for a walk, in the midst of it all and seeing a pretty bug like this. Or even a flower or the fall trees. It's those little things.
I remember when my uncle died years ago now. And I went to his apartment and sat looking out the window and the sunset was stunning.
I still remember that feeling. It was pretty cool.
Sending you lots of huggs and love.
You are amazing!
Oh my friend. I wish I could help you out in some way. I definitely am praying for all of you. Thankful you have seen some moments of beauty and peace. Dementia is terrible and I don't know what the answer is for you. Praying for your appointment tomorrow. You need sleep and peace..
(((hugs)))
Sue
Dear Sandra :)
Bob's arm looks very sore, and I'm so sorry his dementia is getting worse. I admire your strength Sandra through these difficult times and that your appreciation of natures beauty can still fill your heart with joy is heart warming. Your walks with Beau are a blessing as he not only needs you but loves you too. You are not alone. We are all thinking of you and Bob, and hope his ankle has completely healed when he visits the doctor.
Sending warm hugs to you both and a special big hug to Beau.
Sonjia.
Thanks for the update Sandra. Caretakers get the full brunt of it. I have seen this with family and friends over many years. A friend once explained it to me that you don’t know how you will be until you have your feet to the fire. You are incredible! Praying for you three, sending a big hug.
I'm so sorry! Thanks for writing, I think of you often and pray you will get some relief soon. Love and hugs.
Sending Love.
Sandra
I'm so sorry...I wish I could help you but know that you 3 are prayed for each day. Bob's arm looks very painful
Hugs
Cecilia
His arm looks so painful. Sandra I am at a loss for words. I am glad you can write and reach out to us. Praying!
I am thinking these are signs from God that everything will be alright. But everything is in his own time, not ours. I hope these wonderful sights help you keep going. I cannot believe or comprehend how very hard this must be.
As difficult as it is to read these posts, Sandra, it is hard to imagine the pressure and stress you are under daily as Bob's health declines. It's good that you and beau do have some relief on your daily walks. Good thoughts may be of little comfort but you know you have them from your online blog friends.
I am so sorry Sandra for these difficult days. I know this has to be such a struggle for you and Bob and yes, Beau as well. My prayers, my hugs and my love goes out to you.
Those walks with Beau must help you and Beau keep your and his sanity. I pray that somehow, somewhere, you can get more help.
It's good to hear from you. I just wish the news were better, but it's good to hear you and Beau are enjoying your alone time on your walks.
Thanking God -- both for Beau's company, the hawk and the sunrise greeting like a river of gold. Nature's way of letting you know, Life does go on. I hope tomorrow's doc appointment provides some good news. You're still on my Study ladies' prayer list.
I'm sorry it is so hard right now, you are in my prayers. I wish you could get respite care for him.
God bless you all and hold you in His arms. There's nothing good about this situation except your attitude of faith. We are stronger than we think and God will hold us up. I love you and Bob and Beau and pray for you all. Hang in there! The thread you're hanging on will hold.
I am SO sorry sweet friend! Can you visit with his doctor about placing him in a rehab facility fou a few weeks to try and get him back on his feet and give you some rest time? You’re no good to him if you become incapacitated yourself!
The photo is pretty! The real sight must have been beautiful!!
Hugs
Donna
Sending prayers and love your way Sandra
I am so sorry to hear about the issues Bob is having. Happy to hear that his injury was okay. I am also thankful for the beautiful sightings God is sending to you. That grasshopper is very interesting and I love that you got to see the sun rising. Hope his appointment goes well. Take care and God Bless.
We noticed with MiL that there were times of day when her anxiety levels sky rocketed and state of mind deteriorated markedly. Apparently it's a well documented feature of dementia. Look up "Dementia sundowning" for info. Not sure what to do to help you deal with it. MiL was on anti-anxiety medicatio but it had its drawbacks as well
Thanks for the update. it must be hard to find time to do this. So sorry things are not improving. So glad you and beau can escape for a walk and to be able to see some beauty in this tough old world for you. Sending hugs and best wishes. Hope tomorrow goes well.
I guess I missed this post among all my stuff going on, but I am so glad to hear from you, and thank you for the comment on my post too. I LOVE your "flood of gold" picture...that is beautiful, and I can just imagine it in my head as well. What a blessing for you...that is a gift from God to brighten your day. Now that lubber grasshopper is beautiful to look at sort of, but they are NOT good to have and I am sorry to say, but the only good one is a squished one!! They will eat any plant you are trying to keep, and ignore the weeds you wish they'd eat! I have a stick that I use to squish them into pieces. Sorry to be so graphic. I have been anxious to hear from you, and am glad to see this update, even though it is difficult to see and hear all you have been going through. I still pray for God to somehow intervene on your behalf and bring a measure of healing to Bob so he will be calmer. May God continue to give you the strength you need to keep going.
Oh my gosh, thank you so much for taking the time to write this update, especially when things are so incredibly tough right now. That sounds like a truly terrifying few days, like you're carrying the weight of the whole situation while hanging by a thread.
Please know that it is completely okay that you are Not Good and Bob is Not Good. You are dealing with so much, and you're being an absolute rock through it all. You and Beau deserve all the beautiful moments you can find.
I'm so glad that you had that blessed walk today with the cool temps and the heavy breeze. That stunning hawk and the bright, strange Eastern Lubber Grasshopper are such wonderful little gifts of distraction. That description of the giant orange sun spilling golden light down the street, wow. That's a moment your phone never could have captured, anyway. It was just for you.
I'm holding good thoughts for the orthopedic visit tomorrow. Please take care of yourself, even in tiny ways, and know we're all rooting for you to get some peace and rest soon.
www.melodyjacob.com
Post a Comment