Thursday, March 26, 2020

A Charmin Tale of TP


I sat carefully  folding my toilet paper, (about half of what I used in the past) and I thought I really need to cut back on my coffee in the mornings and that will save on TP.

Maybe I need to ration what I have. There is none to be found in stores or online. Even Amazon is out.

Then it occurred to me, I have 3 months supply of Maxwell House, and I am not giving up my coffee, Coffee is my LIFE, I can't move until I have that first cup and the 3 that follow. I am a 4 cup Mama.

I looked to my left, and smiled and thought one of the great things about having a tiny bathroom, is if I stand up off my throne, and move one short step  to my right, I will be in the shower, which has a spray hose and VOILA, instant Bidet Spray.

 Bring on the Coffee.
Sorry if this was TMI... (to much information)

Two rolls of toilet paper walked into a bar...
one ran out......
SORRY!!!! I am on a ROLL.... 
Don't you wish they had not canceled my TOPS meeting today?


21 comments:

Ginny Hartzler said...

Cute puns. Now I am even more nervous about toilet paper. Kroger had some a few days ago! They limited one package to a customer, so we got one. The coffee makes me think of coffee filters. I think they would make good toilet paper in a pinch, and should not be sold out! I just know there's a good joke in there somewhere, but I have not had any coffee in the last few hours, so cannot think of it. Buy the filters. But Phil says they are not flushable. Never mind, keep ziplock bags by the toilet. My bathroom could not be any larger than yours, by the way. I love it that way, because if I start to fall, there is always something close I can grab.

CheerfulMonk said...

:D

Ann said...

Lucky for us you had no TOPS meeting because this made me laugh.

Hootin' Anni said...

Well, to be honest, I like you here on Thursdays! We all need a bit of Florida sunshine!

Yes, that's what I've been posting for over a week now...no TP? Take a shower!

a rich tapestry said...

Your blog posts are guaranteed to give us a laugh out loud moment :) thanks Sandra.

eileeninmd said...

Hello,

Cute puns! We did see TP during our shop at Wegmans, but hubby said we had enough at home. He will not panic shop. It is pretty sad when we would have to ration our toilet paper usage. I am sorry you are missing your TOPS meetings, hopefully they will start back soon. Take care and enjoy your day!

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari OM
Sandra, I commend your recognition of the power of the shower!!! I was totally used to 'spray bidet' in India, so don't at all mind this form of cleansing - and actually, once experienced, you wonder at how unhygienic TP can be, actually!!!

Bwwwwahahahaha... one ran out..... hhahahahahahahahahaha
YAM xx

Rose said...

I am sorry your TOPS is cancelled for your sake, but no, not for mine....LOL I need something to laugh at.

Inger said...

The most vivid description of a bathroom visit I have ever read. I have seven rolls and I got them before all the craziness started. I will make a note next time I put up a new roll to see how long it lasts. I just did that with my coffee too.

My Mind's Eye said...

I hear you loud and clear....
If you have a Wegmans near by they have plenty of TP. We went there today on an off chance we kept hearing how they had stocked shelves with limits to how much you can buy but HEY. All I wanted was 1 pack. They had an entire aisle of TP and paper products. Their devotion to customer satisfaction has won them 2 more customers. We have been loyal customers of Harris Teeter for 30+ years. Check your email for the rest of the story
Hugs cecilia

Chatty Crone said...

Sometimes you have to find the humor in whatever way you can! LOL

Mevely317 said...

Oh my goodness … you are a stitch!
A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do! What was it you said a few months ago about being the 'can-do' generation? Maybe's not a good time to tell you, but:
What to my wondering eyes should appear! I wasn't even looking for TP this morning, but there were (Wal-Mart) associates stocking half a dozen cases of Charmin.

4-cup momma, huh? I'm impressed. Best I can do is 3.

Betty Manousos said...

Lol!! love your great sense of humor.

I’m a coffee lover too. at first I drank a cup a day, and now i am hovering around somewhere three. for me it’s a kind of daily ritual.

Betty Manousos said...

...sorry I meant to say...”somewhere around three.”

Debby@Just Breathe said...

That's so funny! Thanks for the laugh.

photowannabe said...

You make me laugh too much. Believe it or not we were at Walmart when it opened this morning!!
There were about 6 packs on the shelf. Got a small pack..wish I could send it to you...
The only thing we were not able to buy was hand sanitizer. got a pack of disinfecting wipes so we are good for a month.
Enjoy your coffee and happy showering !!!

The Gang at LLB said...

LOL! You are too funny Sandra! On a good note, we are beginning to see the Grocery stores becoming stocked around here again. Hopefully yours will follow suite!

Ruth Hiebert said...

OK, sorry if this is all wrong, but your story had me visualizing the whole thing. OH MY! LOL

peppylady (Dora) said...

Isn't that something there a shortage of T.P...In my community they put amount to what you can purchase

DeniseinVA said...

I am doing my best to find humor in all of this and you added to it. Thank you!!! πŸ§»πŸ§»πŸ§»πŸ§»πŸš½πŸš½πŸš½πŸš½πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

diane b said...

That's the way keep up the humour. Good solution for lack of TP. Not sure how long ours will last.